venti soy chai tea latte

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image from flickr

that’s how i take my coffee. 

i have been upset and depressed for a few days over small stuff. it’s small stuff but i can’t control myself not to get upset. i try to let go, not make a big deal out of it, let karma take its course.. etc. i feel i’m getting better, but with a little help of an antidepressant pill. 

what happens is the tip of the iceberg. i am unable to find joy in anything i do. i like my work but hate people i work with. hate is probably a strong word. i simply despise them. elements from my work give me stress. i can’t sleep, hence the pill. it makes me feel woozy and not so depressed. good. 

i don’t know what job will make me happy. from many friends i talk to, they all hate,or at least dislike, their jobs. i tried high-paying job. it was no good, emotionally. i have low-paying job. people i work with are killing me. i’m in the dark as to how to make myself happy. until i achieve that, happiness is merely a far-fetched concept. 

that’s the end of my self-psychoanalysis. 

antidepressant makes me sleepy. can’t wait to wake up to a soy chai tea latte tomorrow morning.

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